Those of you who know me well know that I have four loves in my life; my husband, my children (counts as two) and science. I love being with my family and seeing them succeed and find things that make them happy and I love to learn new things about science. Most people probably share those feelings about their families, but I know that a lot of people look at me like I am crazy when the little science nerd inside me comes out. It is hard to explain, but every time I understand something more about it I feel closer to my Heavenly Father, almost as if that is one of the reasons I was sent here.
Now, why? You may be asking yourselves am I posting about this truly random thing. Well, I have found myself in a very scary situation that involves these loves and I don't know what to do. The older my children have gotten the more I have come to realize that Southern California is not the place I want to raise them. I know that the weather is great and we have amazing friends here, but middle schools here could scare anyone into homeschooling. For a couple years now we have played with the idea of moving to San Antonio. I can hear you all now, "TEXAS"! It just seems more simple down there.
So a couple months ago, just for the fun of it, I applied to be an educator at Sea World San Antonio. I didn't really think that anything would come from it at first, but then as I did the phone interviews and met the people down there I began to realize that this could really be a way for me to work with science the way I have always wanted to. Last month I was offered the job and they want me to start in May. I am not even to the scary part yet...well kind of.
Back to my list of loves. I have to make sure that all of my loves will still be happy. Don has always wanted to be a baseball coach. Actually I have seen him coach and it makes me want to cry. Nothing makes you love someone more than watching them put their arm around a struggling pitcher's shoulders and walk him out to the mound advising him and supporting him. I know he will be awesome and I know that the chance of him being able to be a coach financially is better in Texas. But he doesn't have a job there and he does here so it is scary to move without knowing that it will happen for sure.
Donald and Eli are amazing. They said as long as we are together that is all they need to be happy. I have always wanted them to be able to run and explore and I think that Texas could give them a better opportunity for that, plus the culture and society are a little less liberal than here in Southern California.
Ok, so now for the scariest part. I would have to go in May, the boys wouldn't come until June so school is out, cause I can't transfer them with 3 weeks left, and Don would not be able to come until the end of the summer (and that's if he passes the test and gets a job at the recruiting fair in June).
My dad thinks I am crazy and sometimes I don't blame him. It is crazy to go so far and leave all you know when you don't even know if your husband will have a job, but there are too many amazing possibilities for me to crawl back under our security blanket and stay here. So what do I do? I am so scared and uncertain, but the decision is here and I only have 43 days to make it.